Systematically Excluded

Systematically Excluded recounts the events that followed my ruling granting a defendant’s motion for relief from a jury panel, and my criticism of a petition for certification of law. What followed became the focal point of years of scrutiny, controversy, and institutional response.

Most people who know me know something of those events. They form the basis of this book. I figure that bodes well for interest in the story, even ten years later.

For many, however, the fact that I was a judge made them reluctant to ask direct questions about what happened or what I said on Facebook—which became shorthand for the entire saga. In many circles, Facebook became a simplified cultural label for a far more complicated sequence of events.

That reluctance extended even to close family members, which explains much of the silence around me. Silence became habit. Habit began to seem like judgment, even when part of it was likely deference.

For years, I assumed that people around me formed opinions about what happened, but I never asked them. No doubt there was judgment. Public controversies create narratives, and people absorb fragments of them.

As a judge, I felt I did not have to explain myself. I spoke through rulings in which I issued declarations and conclusions. It became particularly isolating, however, when the subject matter was not simply my rulings, but statements that spilled beyond the courtroom. The human desire to be understood constantly tugged at me.

Nor was it simply a judicial instinct toward restraint; actual restraints were placed on my speech. That tension defined much of my final seven years on the bench.

This book is not intended as a formal analysis of the law or a comprehensive judicial memoir. As an author, I had to invite readers into a reflection without abandoning the clarity and conviction of my judicial voice.

That explains much of the evolution of this book and why it took far longer to write than I originally imagined.

For all its changes, this book has always represented my response. Early in the process, the book was more of a trauma narrative and a demand for agreement. In its final form, I believe that Systematically Excluded is a restrained and reflective account seeking understanding—not only of what others did, but also of what the experience did to me.